Cameron takes a look at the Book of Mogg
A most pleasant afternoon to you.
I have just heard of this volcano malarky occuring in Iceland (I shall not comment upon this, as my section in the gaffe-department of the library is presumably rather full). However, I will express my concern that it might hinder the Conservative campaign. Half the shadow cabinet have been jetting all over the country, so I worry that the wings of David Cameron’s private jet have been severely clipped.
Speaking of David Cameron, which I’m not really supposed to do because he gets a frightfully upset, I have also been informed that he has declined to present himself for an interview with Jeremy Paxman on Newsnight.
Regular readers will be more than informed of my incredibly popular and well-received interview on the same television program, but Mr Cameron has declined to take such an excellent opportunity.
Indeed, rumours have been circulating that Mr Cameron has behaved in a rather awkward fashion when it comes to the leaders’ debates.
On one hand, I do not see what it is that he is so worried about. He is an excellent media performer, just like yours truly. The press pays attention to him, just like yours truly. Expectations of him are high, just like yours truly. It is entirely evident even a potted plant watching that Mr Cameron will run rings around his feeble opponents. He is the ultimate salesman, whether you know what he intends to sell you or not!
Anyway, I’m getting off message. What I mean to say is that it is precisely because he is so good at this sort of PR event, he no longer needs it.
In any case, he has nothing to gain from such an appearance. His reputation is so good that if either of the other two come out of it still breathing, the media will classify the event as his failure; totally unfair as I am certain you agree. On the other hand, Mr Cameron is on course for a majority Tory government.
Mr Cameron needs neither Paxman nor these debates. All he need do is be patient, be quiet, and wait for his majority.
Somewhat like the situation of yours truly. Perhaps Mr Cameron and I have more in common than our schooling and politics!
Tags: interviews, Jeremy Paxman, Leaders Debates, media, Mr Cameron
Found more on the Book of Mogg:-
‘And, Lo, in those days of turmoil there came forth Jacob, that is to say the Son of Mogg, brother of Annunziata, which is to say ‘The nun with the hat’ (she isn’t a nun but we won’t bother about that)and they joined forces with the Toh-Rees. And the Toh-Rees looked upon this and saw all was not good. And Call-me-Dave, the leader of the Toh-Rees, feared the family of Mogg and their sharp suits and how they spake with forked tongue. And he bleated, yet the followers heeded him not. Just as the rest of us will on May6.