Get off my lawn!

The press have been camped out on my doorstep in Somerset trying to catche a glimpse of yours truly. (Joke’s on them!)

One reporter has had to be thrown off my land for trespassing and trying to get an interview, from the Sunday Times I think. It is rather annoying because my father, Lord William Rees-Mogg used to be the editor. I would expect them to show more sympathy.

I am absolutely fed up of these ghastly journalists who think they have a god-given right to be spoken to. I am not available for comment! I have already explained here that this is the only way I shall communicate, partly because Conservative Office have explicitly forbidden me from making or doing anything.

As if this were not enough, the internet has now learned of my curfew, notably Sally Bercow, the Speaker’s Wife (and all around lefty traitor) and journalist Camilla Long has been creating a fuss as well.

So, I shall say this one more time: All I am supposed to do is sit quietly, VERY quietly, and wait to be elected!

Tags: general election, photo ops

They think it’s all over… it is now!

What better way to start off the campaign than with a sporting catchphrase! Granted it comes from 1966, when ghastly lefty Harold Wilson won a massive majority. I assure you the outcome will be rather different this time!

I was rather busy yesterday in the City, but my office staff managed to crank out a short press release to act as a starting whistle. I will not attempt to tread on their toes, so instead I shall just tantalise you a smidgen: (I got in trouble for jumping the gun and breaking the embargo last time! It’s funny how my blogg is more effective at getting out the news than the official North-East Somerset Tory site)

“Jacob Rees – Mogg was selected as candidate for the newly formed constituency of North East Somerset, (formerly Wansdyke), in 2007 thus fulfilling his ambition to represent the Somerset parliamentary seat in which his family has lived for generations.”

This sets the tone for my campaign very well, in that there will not be much of a campaign. I have written here previously about the lack of activists, my media-ban (which I hope to break, though Conservative Head Office have been on the phones already!) and other problems we face, but none of this matters any more as this election is already in the bag!

David Cameron kicked off the campaign (more football phrases to appeal to local types) in London. I signalled my availability, but a party official told me that we were to be gathering in Kensington Gardens. Imagine my surprise as I arrived and had nobody to canvass but the ducks, who were so hostile they must have been Labour fowls. The official must have been mistaken, they would never have sent me to the wrong place deliberately.

Cameron is hiring a private plane to jet him around the country during the campaign. I have no idea why he needs another one, but it would have been better to clone him as he is apparently the Tory Party’s only asset.

See you in May!

Tags: david cameron, general election